AI Art by me

There’s the classic scene from “Men in Black” where J tells the kid not to press the red button.  Later on, he tells the kid to push it!  

I feel like some Doms or Tops have that red button, and many don’t.  It’s in a place that can’t be accidentally pushed, but it must be a conscious choice by the person riding in the car or scene.  There are a lot of Doms who say they are sadists but aren’t really.  What’s the difference?  Hmm…as they are teasing, torturing, or inflicting mayhem on their submissive, are they smiling or laughing?  Is there a twinkle in their eyes, or are they hesitant, constantly checking, or worse, apologizing for what they’ve done?  Not really a sadist.  

Don’t get me wrong!  All things should be done only with the submissive’s prior, informed, and enthusiastic consent.  This should be agreed to ahead of time and NOT in the moment or negotiated up during a scene. This is one reason I prefer to let the submissive pick the toys we use ahead of time, rather than me choosing.  Just the other day, my lovely slave, Reina, was saying, “I choose this!  I can’t believe I chose this, but I did!” This was said as she was writhing and whimpering from an implement she’d chosen for me to use.

Here’s why I mention the red button.  

Once communication, trust, and consistency are in place in a D/s or Top/bottom relationship, the Sub or Bottom can, if their D or Top is a sadist, glance at the red button and decide whether to push it.  Once pushed, then things go to a new level.  It’s still a controlled level, but more of that control goes to the D or Top.  Things become rougher, deeper, more intense than previously.

Submissives and Bottoms will talk with each other, and Ds or Tops who have that red button are recognized.  They discuss whether the Ds ot Tops are trustworthy once that button is pushed and word gets around.  People speak of them with phrases like, “they do good work” or “they’ll do a good job.” These are the Ds or Tops who can take a Sub or Bottom into the Red Zone, push their boundaries, and still stay safe.

I see this in some frustrated Subs or Bottoms who keep being with people who have no red button.  They wish there were one, but they are also very hesitant or scared to trust a Dom/Top with a red button.  The result of being taken so far into the danger zone is powerful and can be addicting.  I appreciate those who have trusted me to take them there.  This is where deep submission comes from and is, therefore, more than a little frightening to some who aren’t sure they wish to be there.