AI art by Me.

I know two submissives who are researching the term Alpha Submissive. Each has found articles that they don’t agree with 100%, but partially. For the record, I read none of these articles. I just helped them share.

I’ve written on this topic before, but it’s been a while, so I’ll do it again.  What do I mean when I use the term ALPHA SUBMISSIVE?

First, only certain types of women are capable of becoming alpha submissives. These women most often play a dominant role in their careers. They are leaders and usually Type A. They keep a tight rein on their workers and their personal lives, and if they are married, they typically run that relationship either outright or behind the scenes.  

I don’t mean in any way to say they are bitches or bad asses but they can be seen as this by coworkers or family members or even a significant other that can’t stand up to them.  Herein lies the problem that can cause them to become an alpha submissive.  No one has ever, EVER put them in their place or knocked them on their ass before!  This has more to do with never finding someone capable rather than stubbornness not to capitulate.

From what I am hearing, observing, and being told, not many Doms walk the walk versus just talking the talk.  It takes work, patience, and consistency to be a good dominant.  It isn’t just snapping your finger, yelling loudly, or spanking them into submission.  These kinds of straw dog doms are what these strong women have been dealing with up to now.

Now enters into their life an actual dominant.  They take notice of it immediately, and it prickles them to challenge him.  Little bits of banter, teasing, sarcasm, and more will come into play as they talk with this man.  If he listens carefully, they will start giving him hints on overcoming them.  It’s true!  These women WANT to find someone who can take them…emotionally, psychologically, or just plain take them over a knee and give them a good spanking!  This can be verbal as well as physical.  I can think of a couple of women in the blogosphere, and I’ve enjoyed giving a few swats on their bottoms along the way.  They know who they are, and I’ll leave it at that.  

As the dominant rises to the occasion, the woman begins to panic a little, and some will decide on Flight instead of Fight.  I know a few of these who are more than a little frightened of capitulation turning them into mush, and they will be taken advantage of.  It could be if the dom in question isn’t ethical.  There are more than a few who can walk the walk but only do so until they get what they want, then move on to the next conquest.  They are in it for the trophies and not the dynamics.

These women might begin to subtly ask permission or the opinion of the dominant man they’ve met.  “Do you think I should?  Do you think I can?”  It might even come into “May I please?  Would you please?”  If called on this too soon, they will defend it as just being polite, but there’s a difference between just polite and the tenuous tendril sent out for permission, approval, or command.

You’ll notice a lot of talking or communicating going on here. Finding, turning, or training an alpha submissive takes time, lots of communication, and just plain old work on the connection. Are they testing the man? Somewhat, whether consciously or not, they are testing boundaries, and that part of them will NEVER change.

Alpha Submissives crave, need, and desire someone to stop all the voices of worry, work, and chaos in their heads.  They wish to find someone they can safely just kneel, bare themselves, and be told what to do and how.  They only do this with a dom that has earned the right.  It isn’t a one-off either.  They will continue to test, poke, and, yes, even brat a little to make sure their dominant cares enough to put them back in their place.  

An alpha submissive will say through gritted teeth that they want and need someone to put them in their place, but once said, they will grin and blush about it being a strong truth for them.  God help the man or dom that does a victory dance or lap about this.  Just take the win, shut up, and enjoy it.  Rubbing their noses in it, especially in front of others, will cause resentment, and they’ll make the dom rue the day he did so.

Alpha submissives are so wonderful to me because once the collar goes on, metaphorically or not, they are the best submissives in the world!  Why?  They’re so damned intelligent and full of passion that they will invent ways to please, tease, and make life better for their dominant.  They will foresee things way ahead of the dom and take care of them.  I do not mean it in a mommy way, but as an intelligent lady who shows respect to her man by doing her job to the best of her ability.  This goes to social things and remembering what spots on their man do the most to get him off the best.

They don’t need to be told twice.  Once they learn (are trained) what the dom wants, they will automatically do it again before he even has to open his mouth.  Some doms find this intimidating or “topping from the bottom,” but they are very wrong.  This kind of submissive takes the initiative to give ideas and watch for different things or ways that will enhance what their dom wants from them.  They’d do RESEARCH!  They’ll shop online for some new toys to please their man.  

As I told two women the other day at a Munch, if I wanted a doormat, then I’ll buy a doormat.  Strong or Alpha Submissives aren’t boring!  They’re so much fun to learn, capture, and train.  Make no mistake, if an alpha submissive is captured, it is because they chose to be.  The dom has proven worthy, and they will gift him what he has earned: their trust and submission.

Lastly, I will comment on how deeply these alphas will sink into submission.  “I can’t believe I’m doing this.”  This is a phrase I’ll often hear as they go just a bit further, take the clamps a little longer, crawl for me without even being commanded to do so because they know I enjoy it, AND they’ve learned they enjoy doing it for the right dominant.  The work continues.  They will always need input, understanding, patience, and affection besides sex and impact play.  These women are the real deals.  Dishonesty, fakery, conceit (arrogance is when you are that good, conceit is when you SOUND that good but are NOT) are the three things that will lose, turn off, and unleash the scary alpha side of them.

As always, I am open to discussion, to be told I’m flat-out wrong, or have more ideas added to this article.  I’m just spouting my opinion and what I think when using the term.  I’m just describing what I’ve seen, experienced, and know from nearly always being attracted to this kind of submissive.  Let me know what you think.