I made a couple of these creations on Night Cafe last night. I was in the mood for it and half-expecting to wake up to a ban notice since they make no bones about what’s happening. You can also make AI creations into animated ones. It costs more credits but can be fun. I did that with the above creation, which turned out very well. The animation shows him finishing with the collar and her looking up at him in pride and pleasure.

This How-to is fairly simple and straightforward. I’m also making a pitch for collaring to become more common in submissives and, of course, slaves. It often gets overlooked for various reasons, such as social acceptability, astigmatism regarding slave versus submissive, and not understanding the importance of it.

Let’s start with that one – the importance or purpose behind collaring your submissive or slave.  

Humans respond better to physical manifestations of abstract ideas than to just keeping them in their heads. This is a key reason for some form of collaring in the submissive.  It is a reminder of to whom thaty belong.  This doesn’t have to be a blatant example of a BDSM collar with a padlock.  It can be as subtle as a silver chain link necklace or choker.  If a neck piece won’t work, go for a ring or an anklet.

The main idea is that it is something the sub/slave wears constantly and is a physical reminder of their commitment or promises to their Dom/Master. A lot of people don’t see a need for this, and that’s fine. I’d like to point out one more aspect of this that is its most important component: anchoring.

When a submissive has a piece of jewelry or something they wear to remind them of their being owned, they have an anchor they can touch, feel, grab on to when times get tough but their dominant isn’t around.  This is highly crucial in online dynamics.  I’d argue it is still essential for in-person dynamic situations as well.  Want to know a straightforward example of it?  What about the crosses people wear to signify their bond with God?  They touch them for comfort, hold them when they pray, and the sight of them brings comfort.  These are all the things a collar-type object can do.

On to the kind of things that can be used.

I am a classist, so I advocate for a collar. Amazon, Etsy, and eBay are chock-full of different examples that could be ordered. Ideally, the dominant has the sub pick out three to five kinds that the sub likes, and then the dominant chooses the final one. I will ask the sub which of the three they fancy the most and go with it. It needs to be vital to them, and they must like it.

As submissives who have known and worked with me will attest, I am not the most subtle in my choices for them. Since they have to live with it, they should have more say.  This also means if they don’t want neckwear, then go with something else.

Rings are easy to wear since a lot of people wear them.  Here again, there are the subtle ones and the not-so-subtle ones.  I have the unsubtle one on my blog here as an example.  Once more, I can point to something ordinary in our society that is similar: wedding rings.  These rings are the socially acceptable version of collaring another person into a commitment.  Our world has gotten into the habit of checking that ring finger to see if the person is “already taken.”  If it works for marriage, then why not for a dynamic?

Anklets are also a simple solution and can be suitable for those with a fetish for them.  I also feel like the right kind of anklet can seem normal but also harken to the sort of thing a concubine or slavegirl might have worn as she danced.  I told you I was a classic kind of Dom.

A last paragraph to address the polyamorous in the room, there is the possibility of a sub having more than one dominant at the same time.  In these cases, I suggest they, the Doms/Dommes, decide which will have what part.  One gets the neck and the other an ankle?  This means a submissive has two anchors since they belong to more than one person.  I’d say this would seem confusing, but I can’t say that since it isn’t confusing to me to think of owning more than one submissive.

Give it some thought, time, and a lot of discussion between you and your sub or your dominant.  It’s a choice that needs to be agreed upon by both parties.  It’s a great way to enhance the feeling and depth of a dynamic while also giving the submissive an anchor of support and comfort.