Grey Man's Memoirs

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Grey Man

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“Trojan Horse of Depravity”

AI art by me.

Today was a good. The AI was cooperative with me in creating what I wanted with less fuss than usual.

Today’s topic comes from a reader, fellow-blogger, and fellow-author, Jaye Elise. She wrote in a comment about how we all are “Trojan Horse’s of Depravity” while we walk amongst the white-washed, vanilla world. This is the kind of imagery it evoked in me when I read her phrase.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve learned that all of us carry a Trojan Horse inside of us. There is a secret compartment where we keep our kink, our inner judgement of others, our acknowledged and even unacknowledged guilty pleasures.

Some people aren’t even aware those horses are inside of them until something jars it loose and the trapdoor opens to spill out all the secrets. A lot of these people end up in therapy as they learn how to reconcile a new part of themself. Some people have put layer-upon-layer of plaster or concrete to keep the horses shut up.

In the Secret World, as I described it in a recent poem, we denizens can often see it in others as we pass by but it usually takes more like reading it on their blog. Some of us have to live in situations where we cannot just open the trapdoor and let it run free. I used to be like that but the trapdoor has been uninstalled for me. I no longer will make excuses for who and what I am.

However…

To fit into the whiteboard society I live in, I do keep up appearances of being just a nice old guy who seems so funny and likeable. There are a few who will notice the dominant streak in me and respond somewhat. It doesn’t mean they are a submissive but have some of it in them.

Unlike the Doms in my stories, I do not try to ferret them out or get them to admit it, etc. I just enjoy the smiles that I remembered her name or what she told me two conversations ago. The little blush as I smile more warmly at them because I see the twinkle in their eyes. Today’s world/society is not as forgiving or understanding as the one in my writings.

So, I guess I am a part of the Trojan Horse Effect after all. It’s just my inner one that is empty and no longer needed. I don’t hide from myself and my sometimes darker demons. I tend to be a lot happier this way.

Master Grey

Responses to ““Trojan Horse of Depravity””

  1. nora girl

    I doubt you have to work hard at coming off as, “just a nice old guy who seems so funny and likeable”…because you are funny and likeable. You are multidimensional and you have needs, and I hope you are able to create a life where you can live authentically as your true self. What a beautiful life that will be!

    Reply
    1. Grey Man

      Welll…once a con man, always a con man, eh?

      Seriously, your words are like cool, gentle rain on a parched ground. Thank you, dear nora.

      Reply
  2. jayeelisewrites

    It’s incredibly liberating to be able to acknowledge what we are, choose how we share it with the world, and determine with whom we share it. Everyone should be so lucky! 🙂 Thanks for the shout-out! And glad to have provided some inspiration!

    Reply
    1. Grey Man

      You’re very welcome for the shout-out. One of these days, I’ll actually make a page that shows what blogs I follow…but as Aragorn says, “Today is NOT that day.”

      Liberation is a good term for it.

      Reply
  3. Jamesxmorgan

    Fiction is fiction and fact is fact (in theory at least) but fortunately there are times when the two overlap. I have lurked (and liked) enough for you to guess that I enjoy your writings (both types) and hope that you will continue.

    Reply
    1. Grey Man

      Thanks, James. I was beginning to wonder if you were going to comment. I plan to mention you as my most ardent fan in my next announcements-kind of post. Would it be okay with you if I put a link to your blog in my Reading Room? Thanks for liking. I saw that you are into ff which I have no problem with but not really a thing for me.

      I do try to write as factually and accurate as I can both in my articles and in my stories. Let’s say I’ve either done personal research or very personal interviews with those who would know if I am on point. 😉 Thanks for the comment and compliments.

      Reply
      1. Jamesxmorgan

        Well there’s fact and fiction again – at the moment I write mainly ff fiction whereas reality is necessarily different ! Please do reference my blog, the offer is much appreciated. I will happily reciprocate if you do wish.

      2. Grey Man

        I’ll get to work on it. I’d be happy to be listed on yours as well.

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